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I’m Kinda Done With MMA

Toussaint Morrison March 20, 2017 CultureOrgy No Comments on I’m Kinda Done With MMA

This past Saturday, Jimi Manuwa, an extraordinary mixed martial artist, knocked out Corey Anderson with a brilliant left hook perfectly placed to the lower jaw. Manuwa moves on to 17-2 in the UFC, and he will most likely fight… I have no f****ng clue. You see, combat sports are subjective as all hell. There is no touchdown that scores you a fixed amount of points, nor a home plate that establishes a clear destination where you’ve scored a point, nor a playoff bracket that definitively pits you against your next opponent. Combat sports, such as MMA and boxing, are scored by judges with a subjective point of view on a fight where limbs are thrown towards opposing bodies within split seconds. Therefore, the subjective nature of MMA and boxing is subject to human error.

If/when a judge screws up, it’s somewhat forgiveable. However, when a fight is clearly botched due to, what feels like, extreme amount s of b***sh** involving money politics, a focus on the effect over the cause, and a complete incompetence of one’s job… then combat sports becomes pro-wrestling.

I don’t know who Jimi Manuwa will fight because the UFC has embedded itself so deeply in fights based on star power that the rankings don’t even matter at this point. Yoel Romero has greasily beaten the life out of his last 5 opponents (minus Jacare) and legitimately is next in line for the welterweight title. Alas, we live world where there actually is a human being more of a douche than Luke Rockhold. That human being is Michael Bisping, who the UFC has allowed to hand pick his fights, get the life kicked out of him by Dan Henderson and still have the judges score the W in his favor, and dodge the top Middleweight contender in Yoel Romero. They’ve lined up Bisping against Georges St. Pierre for a money fight in… well, they don’t have a date yet. Yes, the UFC is hyping a fight without a f*****g date, which has the feels of promoting a date without a movie.

So, now that we’ve established the path of an MMA fighter in the UFC is determined by star power, and not by performance, let’s take a closer look at the actual fights and what determines a winner and a loser. Over the past month, the judges scoring UFC fights have absolutely fallen asleep at the wheel and let the vehicle collide into a steamy pile of negligence and nepotism. Evidence lie with the following:

UFC 207, Holly Holm vs. Germaine De Randamie

UFC 207, Anderson Silva vs. Derek Brunson

UFC 209, Stephen “Wonderboy” Thompson vs. Tyron Woodley

UFC 204, Michael Bisping vs. Dan Henderson

If you haven’t seen any of the mentioned fights, I implore you to YouTube the fight and make a judgment for yourself. In each of these fights, either the ref or the judges simply don’t do their job, score the fight in favor of the fighter that clearly did not win, OR don’t act accordingly while the fight is happening when blows are thrown after the bell. So, now we’ve established there is no gravity to how a fight is officiated or scored. Which leads me to… I’m out.

No, I don’t care about Cormier vs. Anthony “Beats Women” Rumble.

No, I give no Fs about GSP vs. Bisping, where the belt holds as much weight as an imaginary friend to a 4 year-old.

No, I don’t care who just starched Vitor “No More Roids” Belfort off the face of the map. He’s 40, on TRT, and makes a subconscious part of me cry to watch him get battered into CTE.

We’re in the age of paper champions in the Middleweight and Welterweight division, where the champions run, the fighters on a win-streak get underpaid and overworked, and the shit-talkers are in a win-win.

With all that said, best of luck to Jimi Manuwa. The way things are running, he’ll wind up in a death match located in Brazil against meth-addled Grizzly Bear. I’m taking a break. I’ll wait for the Anthony Joshua fight.

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